How to RSVP: Etiquette and Message Ideas
When you receive an invitation with an RSVP, it might be tempting to pin it to the fridge along with the invite and promise yourself that youll deal with it later. After all, its no big deal if you forget to RSVP, right? Not quite. The truth is, RSVPs are a big deal for the person handling the event because they allow them to accommodate and prep for the right amount of guests. These tips will show you how to RSVP the right way.
What does RSVP mean?
The term RSVP stands for the French phrase rpondez sil vous pla?t (please respond) and its considered impolite to leave your hosts hanging. An RSVP is a polite request for you to inform the host whether or not youll be attending their event so they can plan accordingly.
Its important for the host to have attendance numbers so they can account for the amount of food needed and the seating arrangements. This will assure that everyone is comfortable and has a good time at the party.
When should you RSVP by?
Many invitations include a respond by date, but its best to reply as soon as possible. Its all too easy to let an RSVP slip your mind until its too late. Responding early also shows enthusiasm and excitement about the event. If you arent sure what your plans are, contact your hosts and let them know. They may be able to accommodate a maybe for one or two guests.
Types of RSVPs
Whether it is a formal invitation with an RSVP card or an informal invitation with reply instructions, make sure to respond in the manner indicated.
Mailed invitation with RSVP card
Fill in the card and mail it back in the enclosed envelope before the date listed, or preferably as soon as you receive it. Check to see if the event allows a plus one. If it does, double check that your date can make it before you RSVP for them.
How to fill out a wedding RSVP
Wedding invitations commonly include an RSVP card and a pre-addressed envelope. The card may be as simple as writing your name and checking off a plus one and dining choices, or it may include a bit more space for a thoughtful note. If there is blank space on the card you are expected to write a note.
It is also common for a wedding RSVP card to include an M with a blank line after it. Following the M, you should write your title (Mr., Mrs., Miss) and name.
If you are unsure if you can bring a plus one, look to the invitation envelope to see if and guest is clearly stated. Asking to bring a guest if the wedding invitation doesnt explicitly say that you can is considered inappropriate. It may cause a strain on the happy couples finances.
Mailed invitation with no response card
If you received a mail invitation with no response card, you can call, email or send a handwritten note to the host with your response. If they list an email, its best to send an email. If they list a phone number, you should call. This way the host gets the information in the preferred manner.
Telephone invitation
Let your host know on the spot whether or not youre able to attend. If you arent sure, let them know that you need to check your schedule, but do get back to them as soon as possible.
Regrets only RSVP
This means that your host is planning for you to be there, unless he or she hears otherwise. Usually this type of RSVP is reserved for events with more than 250 guests, such as fundraisers or corporate events, where keeping track of attendees would be a Herculean effort. In this case, you need only worry about a response if youre sure you cannot attend.
Electronic invitation
These days, invitations are often sent through sites like evite.com or via a Facebook event. You have the option to select yes, no or maybe (and may have the option to include the number of guests attending). Be sure to follow up later if you select maybe, so the hosts can have enough refreshments and favors on hand.
Emailed invitation
If its a personal invitation to an event like a bridal shower or birthday party, hit the reply button. For suggestions on how to craft a response, see below.
How to RSVP by email
When you get an email invitation, youll want to respond with a more thoughtful message than just yes or no. If youre close friends with the host, you can respond in a more fun, casual way. If its a formal or professional event, you may want to be more official in your response.
Template for accepting an invitation
Hi [Name],
Thank you for inviting me to [event]! I will be attending and have marked the date on my calendar.
I really look forward to [personalize]. See you on [date].
Sincerely,
[Signature]
Formal template for declining an invitation
Hi [Name],
Thank you for your invitation to [event] on [date]. Unfortunately, I will not be able to attend the event.
I appreciate your invitation and hope to have the opportunity to attend next year.
Sincerely,
[Signature]
Informal template for declining an invitation
Hi [Name],
Thanks so much for inviting me to [event]! Unfortunately, Im busy on [date] and wont be able to make it.
Really sad to miss [personalize] Lets catch up soon!
Best,
[Signature]
No RSVP requested
If you receive an invitation without an RSVP, youre not obligated to reply. However, you may wish to drop the hosts a short note to thank them for the invitation and let them know if you you will be attending.
Changing your RSVP
It is impolite to change your RSVP for other social plans. If an emergency arises, let the host know that you cant make it as soon as possible.
If you were unsure whether you could attend or you RSVPd no, but later discovered you could make it, communicate that with the host. They may be able to accommodate a maybe or add you to the party late.
The most important thing to remember is that if you say youll attend, you should be there. ?A host puts thought into making the event special for their guests, including you, so its gracious to accept or decline the invitation as soon as possible to help them plan. Now that you know how to RSVP and can check it off your list, you may be looking for the perfect gift to bring to the event with you.?Personalized gifts are perfect for any type of celebration, and are a great way to show the hosts how happy you are to attend (which ensures more invitations in the future)!
Sources:
The Spruce (1,2) | LinkedIn | Woculus | Manners Mentor | Emily Post | WhoWhatWear